This week's winner lands on "Free Parking" space. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

I think the prizes on Stump the Sage have become a leading economic indicator these days, and the economy is indeed in deep trouble because for the second time in three weeks, the winning prize was a year of free valet parking at The Cherry Creek Mall! If you think about it, the only real dollar value in this one comes out of the pockets of the guys who park the cars because they aren't gonna get a tip from the schmuck who drives up every week and tells them, "Hey! I'm the dude who won the parking pass on KBCO!" In a way, it's the gift that keeps on taking.

OK... let's check out this week's mental dents and dings:

Question #1: "On Ry Cooder's 'Bop Til You Drop' album, what world class rock artist sang backup on the song, 'Run Grandma Run"? Answer: Chaka Kahn. No stump here so park it yourself, Bud! Grade: C-

Question #2: "What Robert Johnson song opens the CSN song, "49 Bye Byes"? Here's proof that The Sage doesn't have a totally photographic memory like I do because the little acapella riff "Come in My Kitchen" is burned into my high-IQ monkey brain with searing clarity. Grade: B

Question #3: "Who did the original version of "He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother"? Answer: The Hollies. The Sage knew this one and the guy asking the question didn't... he thought the answer was The Byrds! See tip below. Grade: F

Question: #4: Who was the world class rock artist whom Matt Groening referred to as 'My Elvis'"? Answer: Frank Zappa. While I like this question a lot because Frank and Matt are two of my all-time heroes, this question was ruled out for being too subjective. Grade: D+

Question #5: Who was the bass player in Otis Knight and the Day's band in that great scene in the movie 'Animal House'"? Answer: Robert Cray. Grade: D- EQTTTWA

Question #6: "Eric Clapton had only one number one hit. What song was it?" The Sage thought it was "Tears in Heaven" but the answer was "I Shot the Sheriff". A stump for Broncos tickets. Grade: C

Question #7: "Name the world class rock artist who had five number one hits with five different bands." Answer: Paul Carrack of Squeeze, Ace, etc. A stump and a decent question, but the dude couldn't name all five bands. So... read the tip below! Grade: B

This week's tip: There is this thing on your computer called "Google". It's like a magical genie that can answer ninety-nine out of one hundred rock trivia questions. Use it before you ask your questions, people!

This week's story: One of the most annoying questions called in to Stump The Sage ever was this: "What world class rock artist shares the same name as a character played by Humphrey Bogart?" Answer: Dave Matthews. I can't believe this one was accepted! You gotta ask yourself, what is the overall significance of this question?!!! I mean, it's not like Dave M. was born with a different name and he saw a Humphrey Bogart movie when he was forming the band and he changed his name. Those kinds of questions are the turf of Lynyrd Skynyrd and The Marshall Tucker Band, of course.

NEWS FLASH! I AM LEAVING TOWN TOMORROW TO SPEND THE HOLIDAYS WITH MY RELATIVES IN THE CONGO. I'LL BE GONE FOR THE FOR THE REST OF THE MONTH... NO MORE POSTINGS UNTIL I GET BACK IN 2009. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

This week's video: Nothing gets me more into the holiday spirit than Spinal Tap doing "Christmas with the Devil"...